033: Raising Children Away From Family

October 13th, 2019 · 50 mins 45 secs

About this Episode

Parent Driven Development

Episode 033: Raising Children Away From Family

00:28 Welcome, Adarsh Pandit

  • Adarsh is a self taught coder, scientist and consultant. He is the founder of Cylinder Digital, a software design and development studio, and is on the board of Ruby Together.

  • This episode we discuss what it’s like to raise a family, while living away from your parents and other family members.

03:00 The difficulties of raising a family away from family

  • Lack of support
  • Career trade offs
  • Finding a sitter

07:01 Home-Ops: The Business Side of Raising a Family

  • Who can help with childcare?
  • Realizing the limitations of parents age and health as they get older
  • Adjusting child care depending on the time, day or event that they are covering for. - who can drive?

13:30 - Coping with coordination

  • Co-op babysitting
  • Drop off playdates with neighbors

17:11 Finding the Right Child/Child and Parent/Parent Match

  • Finding the perfect family match: kids need to get along and parents need to get along
  • Building rapport with other families to become close enough to ask for favors for pick-up give specific dietary requirements, disciplining other kids and have other parents disciplining your kids
  • “it’s probably fine” - trusting other parents with your kids

22:15 The Importance of Being a Patient Parent Without Extra Family Support

  • Effective response to kids
  • Managing stress - yoga, lots of water, getting outside, eating well

23:37 Work Flexibility

  • Staying organized as a working parent
  • Being a consultant has been helpful for Adarsh because he can dial up or down depending on the demands of the children.
  • The benefits of being at home or working at home - enjoy the time with your toddlers because there will be a day they will not want your attention any more.

30:03 The Trade Offs of Having Two Working Parents

  • Potential extra PTO for one the parents
  • One parent typically has a more flexible schedule

32:30 Fail Moments

  • More poop stories, because poop is always funny. #Fail

36:16 Showing Empathy Towards our Kids

  • Kids are actually little people with little personalities and their own personal functions, weird!?
  • Allowing kids to figure things out on their own.

39:30 Genius Moments

  • Allison invites her son Devin on stage during a conference event and he tells says… “Mommy, I just want to be just like you when I grow up” #genius
  • KWu’s diaper change at the playground #fail… having a spare outfit in the diaper bag #genius
  • Adarsh gets his son to poop in the toilet #genius

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Panel

KWu
Allison McMillan
Adarsh Pandit