Episode 058: Co-parenting with Brandon Hays

Welcome Brandon!

Brandon Hays is a dad and engineering leader based in Austin, TX. His professional mission is to help the tech industry improve by organizing people to accomplish things together in environments that recognize and support their "human-ness". His personal mission is to survive parenthood until the kids are in college.

02:40 Brandon's co-parenting

• Starting with traditional gender roles
• Co-parenting was a foriegn concept until remote work..
• The invisible work becomes more visible
• Covid has forced parents to confront the amount of work it takes to raise kids

06:30 Co-parenting during the pandemic

• Awareness that things changed… kids cannot return to school
• Brandon becomes the educator during the pandemic
• The amount of work to parent became too high when everything shut down
• Reworking the home dynamic when one partner needs help
• Asking for flexibility in places where he had previous thought was not available before

10:53 Working out responsibility between partners

• Clear contracts
• Splitting up tasks and making them known to each partner
• Alternating cooking dinner and clean up
• Family clean day
• Creating activities for kids, even after a long day
• Check in with your partner, how are you feeling burden?

14:05 Recognize your partner's strengths

• Being comfortable with how each partner co-parents
  
• Recognition of each partner
• Optimize each parenting style and continue to check in
• Asking and taking the self-care when it is needed

17:30 Working together

19:10 How has Covid refocused things?!

• Strengthened the team mentality
• Hard to sustain the intensity of the pandemic
• Constant change, the on-call parent

24:40 Prioritization - Do our actions line up with our values?

27:00 Take away: preserve time for planning and reflection

28:35 Genius / fail moments

• Allison checks in while her son is in virtual school and feels major mom guilt…
• Chris’s family visits and brings his camper for a huge win!
• Arit slyly phases out her daughters stuffed animal #genius
• Jess’s son goes full into minecraft, but it may be too much.. #possiblegenius
• KWu repurposed geotags for wooden toys for her kids #genius
• Brandon get creative taking pictures of his kids in their natural habitat

How can I support the podcast?

Please follow us @parentdrivendev on Twitter or email us at panel@parentdrivendevelopment.com.

Our website is at ParentDrivenDevelopment.com.

Chris Arcand
Jess
Arit
Allison
KWu

Special Guest: Brandon Hays.

Sponsored By:

• The Preschool Box: Hey parents, whether you are going back to school or learning from home, the Preschool Box is here to help! The Preschool Box is all about helping children unlock their potential by making learning FUN! Each month, The Preschool Box will send you a box packed full of engaging and educational activities with a focus on reading and math skills that will prepare your little one for success in school. It’s AMAZING! These monthly “work at your own pace” activities encourage learning, reading, and creativity in kiddos ages 3-6 and each box has an array of hands on activities, crafts, and worksheets -- which you can structure to match your child’s pace and level of development! And the best part is that every box has a set of focus skills so each month you get new and exciting material to work on! The work you do at home NOW with your kids is SO important for their future! Let The Preschool Box help you and your child have fun learning together! Head over right now to: thepreschoolbox.com and use code "PARENTDRIVEN" to get $5 off your first preschool box! Promo Code: PARENTDRIVEN

Episode 057: Virtual School

03:04 Welcome to Parent Driven Development

03:30 Virtual school with school age children

• Kindergarten, middle school, high school
• Missing out on the life experiences
• Pros and cons

05:25 Exposure to other students

• Not enough time to build up relationships within the zoom chats
• Teachers stepping up to engage the kids with each other and in class
• Tough in kindergarten because the kids can’t break off without a teacher

11:29 Less the supervising time on virtual school

• First week, very hands on, but less and less over time
• Kids have learned to adapt quite quickly

14:00 Extra hands to help

• Parents can do work, but not focused work while supervising zoom school
• Extra help definitely makes a difference

15:45 Homework

• Losing track of how to turn in assignments for middle/highschoolers
• No take home HW for kindergarten
• State assessments
• Perk - you can rewatch the class video if you have questions

21:45 Teacher Props!

• Powerpoints
• Yoga and stretch breaks
• Partner reads
• Side chats
• Parent updates

25:00 Is life better with zoom school?

• Allison is satisfied with the cards dealt, but mourns the first day of school memories
• Chris thinks in some ways, it’s better

30:15 Genius / fail moments

• Chris figures out how to turn facetime back on his son’s devices, but has to keep track of his use.. #genius/fail
• Allison plans her move around the time of year her kids would need to change seasonal clothes. Less work, more organized #genius

How can I support the podcast?

Please follow us @parentdrivendev on Twitter or email us at panel@parentdrivendevelopment.com.

Our website is at ParentDrivenDevelopment.com.

Chris S
Allison

Sponsored By:

• The Preschool Box: Hey parents, whether you are going back to school or learning from home, the Preschool Box is here to help! The Preschool Box is all about helping children unlock their potential by making learning FUN! Each month, The Preschool Box will send you a box packed full of engaging and educational activities with a focus on reading and math skills that will prepare your little one for success in school. It’s AMAZING! These monthly “work at your own pace” activities encourage learning, reading, and creativity in kiddos ages 3-6 and each box has an array of hands on activities, crafts, and worksheets -- which you can structure to match your child’s pace and level of development! And the best part is that every box has a set of focus skills so each month you get new and exciting material to work on! The work you do at home NOW with your kids is SO important for their future! Let The Preschool Box help you and your child have fun learning together! Head over right now to: thepreschoolbox.com and use code "PARENTDRIVEN" to get $5 off your first preschool box! Promo Code: PARENTDRIVEN
• Nurture Life: Parents everywhere are going through so much stress and uncertainty right now. It’s hard to find sources of relief nowadays. This is why we are Parent Driven Development love Nurture Life. Nurture Life provides nutritious, ready-to-eat meals for babies starting at 10 months old, toddlers, kids, and teens, delivered fresh right to your door. Meals are designed to meet the nutrient and portion needs for each age group, and are developed by Nurture Life’s registered dietitians and chefs. Meals are focused on organic produce, antibiotic- and hormone-free proteins and whole grains, and offer a FULL serving of veggies in every meal. Nurture Life has recently launched new and exciting meals, such as the Chicken, sweet potato, & waffle finger food for babies and the Butter Chicken with Peas, Rice, & Mini Naan for toddlers, kids, & Teens. In addition to these new offerings, there will also be additional meals that will be available on the menu for a limited time period to continue to provide innovative, flavorful and unique meals options for families. Nurture Life easy subscription model allows you to sign up for weekly deliveries, skip weeks, or pause your subscription whenever you want. You can build your own box to select the right mix of meals for your family by age group, dietary restrictions, and allergies. Get the best meals for your kids and family delivered right to your door—available for every zip code across the contiguous United States. Get 30% off your first TWO Nurture Life orders with code PARENTDRIVEN30. Visit nurturelife.com to redeem and find a moment of relief when it comes to meal time. Promo Code: PARENTDRIVEN30