003: Internet Privacy and Kids

February 21st, 2018 · 44 mins

About this Episode


First Guest!
Heidi Waterhouse - Parent of two. Developer evangelist for LaunchDarkly. Volunteers teaching sex ed to teenagers. She likes to sew her own conference dresses and ride her bike.

1:00 Internet privacy and safety and how it is adaptable to kids of all ages.

How should kids protect themselves online, have manners, and use their time wisely. Online behavior is permanent these days, so kids should also consider using obfuscated names online. Pseudonyms are personas you can discard if necessary while keeping you safe. Online predation is possible, but you are more likely to be get gendered grief online.

8:00 Problematic relationships with Facebook

You can have a real name account, but you have to behave as if in an office all day. Kids have a harder time controlling impulses. Due to COPPA regulation, parents wanting their non teenage children to have an online account have to lie about the child’s age when signing them up. COPPA, well intentioned, but disenfranchises kids under 13 and forces parents to jump through hoops when getting their children online.

10:57 Wallet identity

Sometimes you want accolades and other positive achievements tied to your persona. Each kid is different and some will want the attention while others won’t. Some things you do in public and online forums will be public, regardless of your preference. As parents, we make decisions for our children. Everything decision we make for our children will be things they’ll have to live with. Some parents choose to not make choices for their children regarding online personas.

14:45 Less physical spaces

A book from Danah Boyd discusses how we’ve deprived teenagers from any space they can meet and hang out so the only space they have left is cyber space. Overscheduling, curfews, no hanging out at malls. Technology is making physical gatherings less common.

16:29 Cyber safety is the new Sex Ed

Schools have Google accounts for kids to use the Google suite for education. Cyber security education is the equivalent of abstinence only sex ed. 70% of parents have a password to their kids’ phones and monitor their devices.

20:35 Safe places for kids to explore online communication and not raising trolls.

Online platforms where kids can interact safely. Discord. Teach children what is appropriate, and give them the ability to identify what is right and wrong. “It’s only online, it doesn’t matter” is how you build an online troll. Everyone is a human on the other side of the screen.

24:51 Determining when your children should level up

Each kid is different and timing depends on each kid. Learnign what should be downloadable to your computer so it doesn’t break. What about your kid wanting a YouTube career? (Yes YouTube, no comments) Keeping their online circles to friend they know in person helps, while having open discussion about their online lives. Let them know they can be monitored, and privileges can be narrowed.

35:13 Genius/Fail moments

Andy - Picked up his kids from school but left his dog there. #FAIL

Allison - Continuation of last episode’s fail. Still reading fire safety book at bedtime. #FAIL

Heidi - 15YO assembled IKEA storage system by himself. #GENIUS

Chris - Kids decided to spend time roughhousing instead of online. Though he overheard from downstairs: SON: Stop! You’re going to break my arm! DAUGHTER: I don’t want to break your arm, I want to break your spirit! #GENIUS

Mandy - Going to Disney World! After a long long time of saving, it’s happening. #GENIUS

Follow & Support

Please follow us @parentdrivendev on Twitter or email us at panel@parentdrivendevelopment.com.

Support us via Patreon and get access to our our Slack Community.


Allison McMillan
Chris Sexton
Andy Croll
Josh Puetz
Mandy Moore